There is a new Barbie doll on
the
market - Joker Barbie ...Barbie with Joker grin and white
face
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Jokes number : 18
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
King
Kong Barbie ...six foot tall ape holding Barbie doll dressed
like Fae
Rae
King
Kong Barbie ...six foot tall ape holding Barbie doll dressed
like Fae
Rae
Jokes number : 17
There is
a new Barbie doll on the
market - Godzilla Barbie ...six foot tall
lizard with Barbie head
a new Barbie doll on the
market - Godzilla Barbie ...six foot tall
lizard with Barbie head
Jokes number : 16
There
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Darth Vader Barbie ...with plastic
helmet; pull the string and
she sounds like James Earl Jones
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Darth Vader Barbie ...with plastic
helmet; pull the string and
she sounds like James Earl Jones
Jokes number : 15
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Princess Leia Barbie ...Barbie with the hairdo from Star Wars
Princess Leia Barbie ...Barbie with the hairdo from Star Wars
Jokes number : 13
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Bearded Barbie ...complete with tweezers
Bearded Barbie ...complete with tweezers
Jokes number : 12
There
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Lion Tamer Barbie ...lion is
included; Barbie's head is
not
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Lion Tamer Barbie ...lion is
included; Barbie's head is
not
Jokes number : 11
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Human Cannonball Barbie
...complete with spring-loaded cannon that
will shoot her 15-20 feet
Human Cannonball Barbie
...complete with spring-loaded cannon that
will shoot her 15-20 feet
Friday, June 25, 2010
Jokes number : 10
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Circus Clown Barbie ...complete with scary face paint and scary
wig
Circus Clown Barbie ...complete with scary face paint and scary
wig
Jokes number : 8
There
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Tonya Harding Barbie ...you
didn't think we'd sell one
without the other, did you?
is a new Barbie doll on the
market - Tonya Harding Barbie ...you
didn't think we'd sell one
without the other, did you?
Jokes number : 7
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Hunchback
Barbie ...pull the string and she cries, "Sanctuary!
Sanctuary!"
Hunchback
Barbie ...pull the string and she cries, "Sanctuary!
Sanctuary!"
Jokes number : 6
There is a
new Barbie doll on the
market - Militant Femminist Barbie ...with an
assault rifle
new Barbie doll on the
market - Militant Femminist Barbie ...with an
assault rifle
Jokes number : 5
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Safari Barbie ...with rifle, pith helmet, and pygmy guide
Safari Barbie ...with rifle, pith helmet, and pygmy guide
Jokes number : 4
There is
a new Barbie doll on the
market - Mortal Kombat Barbie ...includes more
blood than you can even
imagine
a new Barbie doll on the
market - Mortal Kombat Barbie ...includes more
blood than you can even
imagine
Jokes number : 3
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Hippie Barbie
...complete with simulated controlled substances and
paraphernalia
Hippie Barbie
...complete with simulated controlled substances and
paraphernalia
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Jokes number : 2
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Cyclops Barbie
...one eye, right in the middle of her forehead;
Cyclops Ken sold
separately
Cyclops Barbie
...one eye, right in the middle of her forehead;
Cyclops Ken sold
separately
Jokes number : 1
There is a new
Barbie doll on the
market - Werewolf Barbie ...normal doll, except under
a full moon
Barbie doll on the
market - Werewolf Barbie ...normal doll, except under
a full moon
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Jokes number : 13
A good samaritan was walking
home late one night when he came upon this drunk on the sidewalk.
Wanting to help, he asked the drunk "do you live here?" "Yep".
"Would
you like me to help you upstairs?" "Yep". When they got up on the
second floor, the good person asked "Is this your floor?"
"Yep".
Then the good samaritan got to thinking that maybe he didn't want
to
face the man's irate and tired wife because she may think he
was the
one who got the man drunk. So, he opened the first door he
came to and
shoved him through it then went back downstairs. However,
when he went
back outside, there was another drunk. So he asked
that drunk "Do you
live here?" "Yep". "Would you like me to help you
upstairs?"
"Yep". So he did and put him in the same door with the
first drunk. Then
went back downstairs.
Where, to his
surprise, there was another drunk. So he started over to
him. But b
efore he got to him, the drunk staggered over to a policeman
and
cried "Please officer, protect me from this man.
He's been doing
nothing all night long but taking me upstairs and
throwing me down
the elevator shaft!"
home late one night when he came upon this drunk on the sidewalk.
Wanting to help, he asked the drunk "do you live here?" "Yep".
"Would
you like me to help you upstairs?" "Yep". When they got up on the
second floor, the good person asked "Is this your floor?"
"Yep".
Then the good samaritan got to thinking that maybe he didn't want
to
face the man's irate and tired wife because she may think he
was the
one who got the man drunk. So, he opened the first door he
came to and
shoved him through it then went back downstairs. However,
when he went
back outside, there was another drunk. So he asked
that drunk "Do you
live here?" "Yep". "Would you like me to help you
upstairs?"
"Yep". So he did and put him in the same door with the
first drunk. Then
went back downstairs.
Where, to his
surprise, there was another drunk. So he started over to
him. But b
efore he got to him, the drunk staggered over to a policeman
and
cried "Please officer, protect me from this man.
He's been doing
nothing all night long but taking me upstairs and
throwing me down
the elevator shaft!"
Jokes number : 12
A man walks into a bar and
says, "Bartender, give me two shots."
Bartender says, "You want them
both now or one at a time?" The guy
says," Oh, I want them both
now. One's for me and one's for this
little guy here," and he pulls
a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He
can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender
pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks
it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can
he
walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the
bar and says, "Hey,
Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to
the end of the bar and
picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down
and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock.
"That's amazing" he says, "what
else can he do? Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time w
e
were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's
powers!"
says, "Bartender, give me two shots."
Bartender says, "You want them
both now or one at a time?" The guy
says," Oh, I want them both
now. One's for me and one's for this
little guy here," and he pulls
a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He
can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender
pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks
it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can
he
walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the
bar and says, "Hey,
Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to
the end of the bar and
picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down
and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock.
"That's amazing" he says, "what
else can he do? Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time w
e
were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's
powers!"
Jokes number : 11
A man who smelled like a
distillery flopped on a subway seat
next to a priest. The man's tie
was stained, his face was plastered with
red lipstick, and a half
empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his
torn coat pocket. He
opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few
minutes, the
disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say,
father, what causes
arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with
cheap, wicked women,
too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow
man."
"Well I'll be." the drunk muttered, returning to his
paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man
and
apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so
strong. How long
did you have arthritis?"
"I don't have it
father. I was just reading here that the Pope
does."
distillery flopped on a subway seat
next to a priest. The man's tie
was stained, his face was plastered with
red lipstick, and a half
empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his
torn coat pocket. He
opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few
minutes, the
disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say,
father, what causes
arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with
cheap, wicked women,
too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow
man."
"Well I'll be." the drunk muttered, returning to his
paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man
and
apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so
strong. How long
did you have arthritis?"
"I don't have it
father. I was just reading here that the Pope
does."
Jokes number : 10
A man walks into a bar, and
as he makes his
way to the counter, he stops and talks to everyone
in the bar. As he
finishes with each group of people, they all get
up and leave and go stand
outside the window, looking in. Finally,
the bar is empty except for
this guy and the bartender. The man
walks up to the counter, and says to
the bartender, "I bet you $1,000
that I can spray beer from my mouth
into a shot glass from thirty
feet away, and not get any outside the
glass."
The bartender
thinks that this guy is a nutcase, but he wants his
$1,000, so he
agrees. The bartender gets out a shot glass, paces off thirty
feet,
and the contest begins. The man sprays beer all over the bar. He
doesn't even touch the shot glass. When he finishes, the bartender
looks at him and says, "Well, I guess you owe me $1,000,
huh?"
The man answers, "Yeah, but I bet all of those people outside the
nwindow $500 a piece that I could come in here and spray beer all over
the
bar."
as he makes his
way to the counter, he stops and talks to everyone
in the bar. As he
finishes with each group of people, they all get
up and leave and go stand
outside the window, looking in. Finally,
the bar is empty except for
this guy and the bartender. The man
walks up to the counter, and says to
the bartender, "I bet you $1,000
that I can spray beer from my mouth
into a shot glass from thirty
feet away, and not get any outside the
glass."
The bartender
thinks that this guy is a nutcase, but he wants his
$1,000, so he
agrees. The bartender gets out a shot glass, paces off thirty
feet,
and the contest begins. The man sprays beer all over the bar. He
doesn't even touch the shot glass. When he finishes, the bartender
looks at him and says, "Well, I guess you owe me $1,000,
huh?"
The man answers, "Yeah, but I bet all of those people outside the
nwindow $500 a piece that I could come in here and spray beer all over
the
bar."
Jokes number : 9
A circus owner
walked
into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little
show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it.
The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck
from
its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for
$10,000
for the duck and the pot.
Three days later the circus
owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your
duck is a ripoff! I put
him on the pot before a whole audience, and he
didn't dance a
single step!"
"So?" asked the ducks former owner, "did you remember
to light the
candle under the pot?"
walked
into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little
show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it.
The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck
from
its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for
$10,000
for the duck and the pot.
Three days later the circus
owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your
duck is a ripoff! I put
him on the pot before a whole audience, and he
didn't dance a
single step!"
"So?" asked the ducks former owner, "did you remember
to light the
candle under the pot?"
Jokes number : 8
A neutron walks into a bar.
"I'd like a beer" he says.
The bartender promptly serves up a
beer.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
"For you?"
replies the bartender, "no charge"
"I'd like a beer" he says.
The bartender promptly serves up a
beer.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
"For you?"
replies the bartender, "no charge"
Jokes number : 7
John was sitting outside his
local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good
about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts
decrying the evils of drink.
"You should be ashamed of
yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin!
Alcohol is the blood of the
devil!"
Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the
offensive.
"How do you know this, Sister?"
"My Mother
Superior told me so."
"But have you ever had a drink yourself? How
can you be sure that what
you are saying is right?"
"Don't
be ridiculous--of course I have never taken alcohol myself"
"Then let me buy you a drink - if you still believe afterwards that it
is evil I will give up drink for life"
"How could I, a Nun,
sit outside this public house drinking?!"
"I'll get the barman
to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will
ever know."
The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar.
"Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks", then he
lowers his voice and says to the barman "and could you put the vodka
in a
teacup?"
"Oh no! It's not that Nun again is it?"
local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good
about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts
decrying the evils of drink.
"You should be ashamed of
yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin!
Alcohol is the blood of the
devil!"
Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the
offensive.
"How do you know this, Sister?"
"My Mother
Superior told me so."
"But have you ever had a drink yourself? How
can you be sure that what
you are saying is right?"
"Don't
be ridiculous--of course I have never taken alcohol myself"
"Then let me buy you a drink - if you still believe afterwards that it
is evil I will give up drink for life"
"How could I, a Nun,
sit outside this public house drinking?!"
"I'll get the barman
to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will
ever know."
The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar.
"Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks", then he
lowers his voice and says to the barman "and could you put the vodka
in a
teacup?"
"Oh no! It's not that Nun again is it?"
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Jokes number : 6
Two guys
were in a bar,
and they were both watching the television when the news
came on.
It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously
suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet
you
$10 he won't," said the second guy.
Then, the guy on the
television closed his eyes and threw himself off
the bridge. The second guy
hands the first guy the money.
"I can't take your money," said
the first guy. "I cheated you. The
same story was on the five
o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said
the second guy. "I saw the five
o'clock news too. I just didn't think
the guy was dumb enough to
jump again!"
were in a bar,
and they were both watching the television when the news
came on.
It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously
suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet
you
$10 he won't," said the second guy.
Then, the guy on the
television closed his eyes and threw himself off
the bridge. The second guy
hands the first guy the money.
"I can't take your money," said
the first guy. "I cheated you. The
same story was on the five
o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said
the second guy. "I saw the five
o'clock news too. I just didn't think
the guy was dumb enough to
jump again!"
Jokes number : 5
A
serious drunk walked
into a bar and, after staring for some time at the
only woman seated
at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She
jumped up and
slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained,
"I'm
sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."
"Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she
screamed.
"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
serious drunk walked
into a bar and, after staring for some time at the
only woman seated
at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She
jumped up and
slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained,
"I'm
sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."
"Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she
screamed.
"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
Jokes number : 4
The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a
Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having adrink when a
great-looking
female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver
and
cheese in a sentence can have me."
So the Doberman
says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie replies,
"That's not good
enough."
The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says,
"That's not
creative enough."
Finally, the Chihuahua says,
"Liver alone . . . cheese mine."
Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having adrink when a
great-looking
female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver
and
cheese in a sentence can have me."
So the Doberman
says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie replies,
"That's not good
enough."
The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says,
"That's not
creative enough."
Finally, the Chihuahua says,
"Liver alone . . . cheese mine."
Jokes number : 3
A number twelve walks into a
bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
"Sorry I can't
serve you," states the barman.
"Why not?!" asks the number
twelve with anger showing in its voice.
"You're under 18," replies
the barman.
bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
"Sorry I can't
serve you," states the barman.
"Why not?!" asks the number
twelve with anger showing in its voice.
"You're under 18," replies
the barman.
Jokes number : 2
A man stumbles up to the
only other patron in
a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.
'Why, of course,' comes the reply.
The first man then asks,
'Where are you from?'
'I'm from Ireland,' replies the second
man.
The first man responds by saying, 'You don't say. I'm
from Ireland
too. Let's have another round to Ireland.'
'Of
course,' replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks,
'Where in Ireland are you from?'
'Dublin,' comes the
reply.
'I can't believe it,' says the first man, 'I'm from Dublin too.
Let's have another drink to Dublin.'
'Of course,'
replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man
asks, 'What school did you
go to?'
'St Mary's,' replies the
second man, 'I graduated in 1962.'
'This is unbelievable,'
the first man says. 'I went to St Mary's
and I graduated in
1962 too.'
About that time, one of the regulars comes in and
sits down at the bar.
'What's been going on?' he asks the
barman.
'Nothing much,' replies the barman. 'The O'Malley twins
are drunk
again.'
only other patron in
a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.
'Why, of course,' comes the reply.
The first man then asks,
'Where are you from?'
'I'm from Ireland,' replies the second
man.
The first man responds by saying, 'You don't say. I'm
from Ireland
too. Let's have another round to Ireland.'
'Of
course,' replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks,
'Where in Ireland are you from?'
'Dublin,' comes the
reply.
'I can't believe it,' says the first man, 'I'm from Dublin too.
Let's have another drink to Dublin.'
'Of course,'
replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man
asks, 'What school did you
go to?'
'St Mary's,' replies the
second man, 'I graduated in 1962.'
'This is unbelievable,'
the first man says. 'I went to St Mary's
and I graduated in
1962 too.'
About that time, one of the regulars comes in and
sits down at the bar.
'What's been going on?' he asks the
barman.
'Nothing much,' replies the barman. 'The O'Malley twins
are drunk
again.'
Jokes number : 1
A guy walks into a bar
carrying a pair of jumper
cables. He sets 'em down on the bar. And then
the bartender said "Now dont
you start anything!!"
carrying a pair of jumper
cables. He sets 'em down on the bar. And then
the bartender said "Now dont
you start anything!!"
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Jokes number : 53
Q: What's pink and red and can't turn
round
in a corridor?
A: A baby with a javellin through its head.
round
in a corridor?
A: A baby with a javellin through its head.
Jokes number : 51
Q:
Where does a white baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q:
What does it become?
A: An angel
Q: Where does a
black baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q: What does it become?
A: A Bat!
Where does a white baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q:
What does it become?
A: An angel
Q: Where does a
black baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q: What does it become?
A: A Bat!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Jokes number : 50
A baby polar bear goes up to his dad and asks,
"Dad, am I pure polar bear?" The dad replies, "Sure you are son. I'm
all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, your mom is all
polar
bear, and her parents are all polar bear."
Still unsure the
baby polar bear goes to his mom and asks, "Mom, am I
pure polar
bear?" She answers, "Of course you are honey. I'm all
polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear,
and his
parents are all polar bear."
Still not convinced the baby polar
bear goes to his grandparents and
asks, "Grandmom...Grandpop...am I
all polar bear?" His grandmother
answers, "Of course you are
sweetie. We're all polar bear, your mother is
all polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, and his parents are all
polar bear. Why do you
ask sweetie?"
The baby polar bears replies, "Because I'm
f****** freezing!"
"Dad, am I pure polar bear?" The dad replies, "Sure you are son. I'm
all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, your mom is all
polar
bear, and her parents are all polar bear."
Still unsure the
baby polar bear goes to his mom and asks, "Mom, am I
pure polar
bear?" She answers, "Of course you are honey. I'm all
polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear,
and his
parents are all polar bear."
Still not convinced the baby polar
bear goes to his grandparents and
asks, "Grandmom...Grandpop...am I
all polar bear?" His grandmother
answers, "Of course you are
sweetie. We're all polar bear, your mother is
all polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, and his parents are all
polar bear. Why do you
ask sweetie?"
The baby polar bears replies, "Because I'm
f****** freezing!"
Jokes number : 49
Dewey and Odell met
on the Brownsville main
street. "Say," said Dewey, "Ah hurd yew and
yore wife is goin' ta
night school ta take Spanish lessons. How cum?"
"Uh huh," answered
Odell. "We went and adopted us a little Mexican
baby, and we wanna
be able ta understand him when he gets old enough ta
talk!"
on the Brownsville main
street. "Say," said Dewey, "Ah hurd yew and
yore wife is goin' ta
night school ta take Spanish lessons. How cum?"
"Uh huh," answered
Odell. "We went and adopted us a little Mexican
baby, and we wanna
be able ta understand him when he gets old enough ta
talk!"
Jokes number : 48
Q: How many baby sitters
does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: None, They don't make Pampers small enough.
does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: None, They don't make Pampers small enough.
Jokes number : 47
Mother: Why is there a strange baby in the
crib?
Daughter: You told me to change the baby.
crib?
Daughter: You told me to change the baby.
Jokes number : 45
Three men were discussing at a bar about
coincidences. The first man said, " my wife was reading a "tale of two
cities" and she gave birth to twins"
"That's funny", the second man
remarked, "my wife was reading 'the
three musketeers' and she
gave birth to triplets"
The third man shouted, "Good God, I have to
rush home!"
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I
left the
house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty
Thieves"!!!
coincidences. The first man said, " my wife was reading a "tale of two
cities" and she gave birth to twins"
"That's funny", the second man
remarked, "my wife was reading 'the
three musketeers' and she
gave birth to triplets"
The third man shouted, "Good God, I have to
rush home!"
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I
left the
house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty
Thieves"!!!
Jokes number : 44
Mum, is it true my baby sister came
from
Heaven?
Yes, that's right.
Well, I don't blame God for chucking
her out.
from
Heaven?
Yes, that's right.
Well, I don't blame God for chucking
her out.
Jokes number : 43
Why did the baby monster put his father
in
the freezer?
Because he wanted frozen pop.
in
the freezer?
Because he wanted frozen pop.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Jokes number : 38
Today I saw a baby who had put on five stone in
weight in
two weeks by drinking elephant's milk.
Whose baby was
it?
The elephant's!
weight in
two weeks by drinking elephant's milk.
Whose baby was
it?
The elephant's!
Jokes number : 37
Do you like your
new baby sister?
She's
all right.
Do you play with her?
No, and we can't even send
her back because she's been here more than
28 days.
new baby sister?
She's
all right.
Do you play with her?
No, and we can't even send
her back because she's been here more than
28 days.
Jokes number : 36
Who is bigger - Mrs Bigger or Mrs
Bigger's
baby?
Mrs Bigger's baby, because he's a little Bigger.
Bigger's
baby?
Mrs Bigger's baby, because he's a little Bigger.
Jokes number : 35
Would you rather have a baby brother or a baby
sister?
I'd much rather have a jelly baby.
sister?
I'd much rather have a jelly baby.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Jokes number : 33
A distraught mum rushed into the back
yard,
where eight-year-old Tommy was banging on the bottom of an old
upturned tin bath with a poker.
"What do you think you're doing?" she
demanded.
"I'm just entertaining the baby," explained Tommy.
"Where is the baby?" asked his Mum.
"Under the bath."
yard,
where eight-year-old Tommy was banging on the bottom of an old
upturned tin bath with a poker.
"What do you think you're doing?" she
demanded.
"I'm just entertaining the baby," explained Tommy.
"Where is the baby?" asked his Mum.
"Under the bath."
Jokes number : 32
I see the baby's nose is running
again,"
said a worried father.
"For goodness sake!" snapped his wife. "Can't
you think of anything
other than horse racing?"
again,"
said a worried father.
"For goodness sake!" snapped his wife. "Can't
you think of anything
other than horse racing?"
Jokes number : 31
Mrs Brown: Who was that at the door?
Veronica: A lady with a baby in a buggy.
Mrs Brown: Tell her to push off.
"
Veronica: A lady with a baby in a buggy.
Mrs Brown: Tell her to push off.
"
Jokes number : 29
A
scoutmaster asked one of his troop what
good deed he had done for the day.
"Well, Skip," said the scout, "Mum
had only one dose of castor oil
left, so I let my baby brother have
it."
scoutmaster asked one of his troop what
good deed he had done for the day.
"Well, Skip," said the scout, "Mum
had only one dose of castor oil
left, so I let my baby brother have
it."
Jokes number : 28
Doctor, doctor, my
baby's swallowed a watch!
Give it some Epsom Salts: that should help it pass the time.
baby's swallowed a watch!
Give it some Epsom Salts: that should help it pass the time.
Jokes number : 27
Daddy,
daddy, can I have another glass of
water, please?
But that's the tenth one I've given you tonight!
Yes, but the baby's bedroom is still on fire.
daddy, can I have another glass of
water, please?
But that's the tenth one I've given you tonight!
Yes, but the baby's bedroom is still on fire.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Jokes number : 26
Mum, are the Smiths very poor people?
I
don't think so, Jimmy. Why do you ask?
Because they made such a fuss
when their baby swallowed a coin
I
don't think so, Jimmy. Why do you ask?
Because they made such a fuss
when their baby swallowed a coin
Jokes number : 25
Did you hear about Mrs Dimwit's new baby? She
thought babies should be pink, so she took this one to the doctor
because
it was a horrible yeller.
thought babies should be pink, so she took this one to the doctor
because
it was a horrible yeller.
Jokes number : 24
It can't go on! It can't go on!
What can't
go on?
This baby's vest ? it's too small for me.
What can't
go on?
This baby's vest ? it's too small for me.
Jokes number : 23
Why did you drop the
baby?
Well, Mrs
Smith said he was a bonny bouncing baby, so I wanted to see
if he
did.
baby?
Well, Mrs
Smith said he was a bonny bouncing baby, so I wanted to see
if he
did.
Jokes number : 22
What is a baby: A soft pink thing that makes a
lot of noise at one end
and has no sense of responsibility at the
other.
lot of noise at one end
and has no sense of responsibility at the
other.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Jokes number : 17
Why did the vampire baby stop having baby food?
He wanted something to get his teeth into.
He wanted something to get his teeth into.
Jokes number : 15
How did the witch almost lose her baby?
She
didn't take it far enough into the woods.
She
didn't take it far enough into the woods.
Jokes number : 14
Which is the only day you are safe in a cannibal
village?
Sitterdays (when they eat the baby-sitter instead).
village?
Sitterdays (when they eat the baby-sitter instead).
Jokes number : 12
What would you get if you crossed a new-born
snake
with a basketball?
A bouncing baby boa.
snake
with a basketball?
A bouncing baby boa.
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